To Put It Politely

Nature calls in mysterious ways. It calls,
for example, through the speakers of
a McDonald's drive-through or through the balls
of a bugling elk. The sheer dramatics of love
and death—of eating food or sneezing a sneeze—
will bring us to our knees. But what's that snort
beyond the trees? A moose? A bear? Oh please,
not that, that coded message, two longs one short,
the call which lets us all know we're not
just human, but something else—to put it politely,
shall we say—well, say it or get off the pot!
Oh, I must defer, it's so unsightly.
Like a patient at a shrink or a rooftop where it's snowed,
we are, I fear, all destined to unload.